It started out innocently enough. One guy says he doesn’t like unions. Across the table is a union man.
“Here we go!”
It starts. Well, you either like something or you don’t. The banter starts of all the benefits of a union and non-union job.
We might as well have dumped a bunch of apples and oranges on the table. Once the comparisons start the heavy artillery comes out. If you listen objectively both sides have valid points. All these things are okay, but after a while, you have to pull out the things that make you believe in your point of view.
Wages start getting the conversation leaning a little bit. With wages moving up or down; suddenly the jobs are going to be moving. They might be moving toward a union or moving to get away from union.
Once jobs start to moving things really speed up. Immediately, jobs went from America to Canada and Mexico.
After you get on the international bus the jobs can move to Western Europe and then over to China, Vietnam or India. Just as quickly they can move back to this country. Before long the strangest thing happens. Foreign cars are being in made in the wilds of Alabama, Georgia and South Carolina.
I’m not sure if we decided that these jobs are union or not.
The conversation got to leaning even more when healthcare got thrown into the mix. Health benefits would be important to union or non-union employees. I reminded both the union and non-union guys that, if I were in charge, both of their deaths would be quick and painless.
I also told them that if they were ever on life support and their families were distraught and couldn’t decide what to do, I could come and pull the plug on them.
Once we got over the healthcare scare, socialism and capitalism worked into the conversation. After a while land, labor and capital, the three things needed for manufacturing, start being thrown about. This conversation was going full blast like a horse without a bridle. You didn’t know where it was going.
The union non-union argument ended up in the water with underwater welders. Once the welder got under water the wages went up dramatically. In just a few minutes everyone at the table was ready to take scuba lessons and learn to weld underwater.
They tried to get back on track but the conversation had gone too far. Now, fiduciary responsibility to the shareholders and allegiance to the union had seemingly collided with economy of scale and full employment or something.
Next, full-scale politics started. War is just politics by different means. Once we got there it was decided that when ISIS comes they try to kill all of us.
“Suddenly, I’m depressed.”
With that, the bill came and we had squandered a perfectly good hour. What a debate with no clear winner. Hopefully, next week we’ll get on some other subject that is almost as trivial and can’t really be decided in one hour.
One question I want answered is, “Do infants have as much fun in infancy as adults have in adultery?”